Being in a long-term monogamous relationship with a partner can sometimes take the excitement and surprise out of our sex lives. Having a healthy sex life is important to sustaining a healthy relationship. Frustration in the bedroom can lead to partners venting in other forms, which can be the start of a downward spiral into relationship failure. Today, we will explore how to keep the sexual flame strong and healthy between you and your partner.


We have all heard that communication is important in any relationship, but how often do we candidly talk about our sexual feelings and desires? Sometimes it is hard to reach a comfortable stage with our partner to speak openly about what we like and don’t like. We have been raised with society’s notion of taboo for sex, thus it is hard to break free of the embarrassments we have about our sexual desires. Feeling comfortable with our partner is key to a successful relationship, where we can stand naked, literally and metaphorically, in front of them without being judged. To love is to accept and desire a person for all of him or her, including the good, bad and mundane.

Sexual communication is left out of the conversation for various reasons. We try to hide some of our sexual desires out of shyness, but this can improve over time with growing closer with your partner. What we should never try to hide is how we feel about sexual intercourse and intimacy with our partner. Hiding this is like giving a death sentence to the relationship. We should always let our partners know how we feel from what is pleasurable to what either is unpleasant or dull. Communication on this level creates more trust leading to more pleasure, as both partners will know how to best perform sexually for one another.

Extended Foreplay

Foreplay is essential to get both partners ready and excited for sexual intercourse. What we must remember is that foreplay does not start in the bedroom nor minutes before sex. Foreplay can help turning on our longtime partner, which can be difficult when they already know what to expect. The key here is start the flirting and foreplay long before having sex. We need to build up the tension and desire to the point where our partners want to jump on us. Start by giving a little then move progressively into giving more. For an example, a tender kiss on the cheek while your partner is busy doing something else to later grabbing him or her tightly with a passionate kiss on the neck. It is important to keep turning the heat up, then letting it cool. This will drive your partner crazy, especially when you get creative with turning up the heat.

Sex Games and Toys

A fast an easy way to get a bit more excitement in the bedroom is by incorporating games and toys. Sex games give us ideas for things we may have not tried or too timid to ask of our partner. For an example, role playing can give us the chance to be a character that has the sexual desires we are curious to try. If shyness is a problem, getting into character is a great way to overcome it. We can also try adding sex toys to make things more fun in bed. We can start by looking for toys that give pleasure to both partners, such as vibrating cock rings. If choosing a vibrating cock ring, then make sure to look for one with a powerful multi-function bullet vibrator, as showcased in this article. Plus, introducing a sex toy can lead to partners opening up to deeper sexual desires.

Having a long-term relationship does not necessarily mean that our sex lives will eventually become dreary. Keeping the flame going in the relationship takes effort but the rewards are well worth it.

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